You Sure Were Fine, 2009

We rang in 2009 at a friend's party in Chicago (as pictured above). It was fun, but I'm happy to say that we are staying in Springfield this New Year's Eve. No long drive home the morning after! We're going out for dinner, stopping by a neighbor's party, and then meeting up with my brother & co. downtown for the countdown to 2010.

But before we get to all of that, here's my second annual survey of the previous year (you can read the first one here).

1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
I became a puppy mommy! Also, I opened a home studio for lessons and music therapy, wrote music for a children's DVD, and presented at both a national and state conference in the same week.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
One of my best friends, Jill, had a beautiful baby boy.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My grandma passed away in October.

5. What countries did you visit?
Unfortunately, none. Our trip to Mexico was postponed when we bought our new house earlier than planned.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Hmm...I have just about anything I could want already! But if I'm being greedy, I'd love new kitchen countertops and a master bath makeover.

7. What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No one day stands out to me. The whole year was amazing and there are too many memorable moments to list.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Hands down, presenting at the national music therapy conference in San Diego. I overcame my fear of public speaking and discovered that I actually enjoyed it.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Same answer as last year. My lack of domesticity, especially in the kitchen. I am just too lazy/unmotivated/tired to actually cook after a long day of work. Hopefully this will change in 2010!

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Aside from the swine flu, bronchitis, and a particularly nasty case of laryngitis...nope, none.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Our new house! I love every square foot of it.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Same answer as last year. Definitely Zach's. He puts up with all of my momentary outbursts and complaining, and he loves me even at my very worst.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Jon Gosselin's. I watched "Jon & Kate + 8" way before it became popular, and seeing him turn into such a d-bag was a little more than disappointing.

14. Where did most of your money go?
HOUSE, HOUSE, and more HOUSE. Last year it was the wedding, this year it was down payments, new flooring, painters, furniture, etc. etc. But I don't regret one cent of it.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
All of the great publicity my music therapy work received this past year. Radio, television, newspaper, magazines...it was so exciting to see my profession be acknowledged so publicly.

16. What songs will always remind you of 2009?
"You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift, "I Gotta Feeling" by The Black Eyed Peas, and anything by Kelly Clarkson or Lady Gaga.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier. Life gets better every year!
ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner. I'm back into my daily gym routine.
iii. richer or poorer? Richer. More clients and more projects.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Same answer as last year. Cooking. And keeping in touch with my friends. I've been really bad at that.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Less worrying. I worry about everything, and it always turns out ok. It's such a waste of time.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With our families. It was wonderful and exhausting, as usual.

22. Did you fall in love in 2009?
I fall in love with Zach a little more each day. This year, I also fell in love with a tiny golden retriever puppy named Sadie.

23. How many one-night stands?
None, obviously.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
This year's new additions included Dexter, Californication, and 30 Rock.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hate is a strong word. There might be one or two people I dislike more now than before, but I'm not going to name any names.

26. What was the best book you read?
I loved Julie & Julia and The Four-Hour Work Week.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Hands down, Allison Weiss. I love her songs, and her DIY approach to her music career has really inspired me.

28. What did you want and get?
The perfect house and the perfect puppy. Oh, and an iPhone.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
I loved "Up in the Air" and think it's definitely Oscar material. George Clooney is awesome.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned twenty-six. My parents threw a birthday party for me at The Corkscrew and then we went to the Alamo for drinks.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not much at all. It was a ridiculously great year. But maybe a shorter winter? I hate cold weather.

33. What kept you sane?
Having a garage to park in for the first time in my life! Words cannot describe the joy in my heart now that I no longer have to scrape my windshield on icy mornings. Also: summer vacation, family, my macbook, DVR, and whatever else I'm forgetting.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you admire the most?
I loved when Beyonce gave Taylor Swift the microphone during her speech at the VMAs after Kanye West interrupted Taylor's acceptance speech.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Probably health care.

36. Who did you miss?
Friends and family that live far away.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Does Sadie count? She's not a person, but she is the best!

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
The same lesson I learned in 2008 was only reinforced this year. Hard work pays off.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"Do what you have to do so that someday, it's up to you."
What You Have to Do, by me!

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On the Radio

I'm so excited to have made it to the airwaves, and on my favorite radio station, no less! I had the honor of writing two original songs based on two families' stories of how they were impacted by the Children's Miracle Network and St. John's Children's Hospital, here in Springfield. The songs were interweaved with those stories, and played for the first time this morning during the Radiothon.

It is so amazing, as a musician, to use what I have for good causes like this. My goal as a singer/songwriter is not to become rich and famous; I just want to play my music and have people listen and enjoy it. And I jump at the chance to be involved in anything that benefits other people (after all, I am a music therapist!) so the opportunity to be involved with the Radiothon is pretty amazing.

I'll be manning the phones as a volunteer during the last few hours of the Radiothon, on Saturday afternoon. And if you get a chance to listen (either live or online), I will be interviewed at 12:45 CST. Can't wait to be in the middle of all the action!

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Does That Make Me Crazy?

Probably...

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Words of Wisdom

My brain has been a little overwhelmed by life this week; therefore, this blog post is brought to you by the author of an email my mom just forwarded to me. I get a lot of these (mostly from my mom), but I really liked this particular one, penned by 90-year-old Regina Brett of Cleveland, Ohio. The email reads as follows:

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life has taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Maybe someday I will write my own list of life lessons I've learned. But that day is not today, so instead I just bolded a few of my favorites from good old Mrs. Brett. What would you add to the list?

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10 Things I Did This Weekend

1. Listened to three brothers complain about each other during their piano lessons.
2. Went to happy hour for the first time in...apparently, too long to even remember.
3. Ate dinner at Thai Kitchen with my in-laws. The norm.
4. Watched a particularly disturbing episode of "Hoarders". That show scares me.
5. Had my guitar restrung and bought my students' music for Festival.
6. Worked on my new song some more.
7. Saw "Twilight" finally. Still have yet to read the books.
8. Went to church.
9. Cleaned and organized the bathroom in between loads of laundry.
10. Wrote this while impatiently waiting for the return of Dexter.

I know, you're probably jealous of my exciting and glamorous life. I keep telling all of my friends, just move back to Springfield and you too can live the dream!

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The Three F's

Two posts in two days...look at this! Hopefully I can keep it up, though I'm not making any promises. On the agenda today is the Three F's, so without further ado:

F #1: Facebook

I have been a bit of a social media and all-around internet junkie lately (okay, even more so than usual) and just yesterday, created a Facebook page for my music. Sooooo, you might as well go ahead and become a fan.

F #2: Followers

And while you're at it, why not follow this blog? you can do that in the left-hand sidebar below. That way I'll know that people are actually reading, which is further motivation for more frequent posts. Yeaa!!

F #3: Friends

So now that you are a Facebook fan and a follower of this blog, we should probably be friends in real or virtual life, too. If you live in Springfield or know me from college, chances are that we are already friends, or at least acquaintances. If we've never met, go ahead and introduce yourself via the comments section of the blog, my Facebook page, or email. I can't wait to meet you!

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Back to Basics

Sooo....I made the switch to Tumblr back in July, and really liked it at first. The idea of short, frequent posts was appealing, and for a while, I got into sharing links, pictures and quotes in this format.

But I never really lost that "lonely kid on the playground" feeling. Tumblr has its own community, and even assigns popularity numbers (cleverly called Tumblarity) based on how many followers you have, the number of posts you write and reblog, etc. My Tumblarity was pretty pathetic, and aside from that, Tumblr and I just didn't click. I was over it.

So I'm back at Blogger, where I feel very loved. Hope you'll continue reading, and I'm sure to be better about posting now that I have reunited with my favorite blogging platform.

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Did I Really Just Make a YouTube Video?

Yes, yes I did.

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Brand New

My favorite self-written song yet, I think. I love the guitar accompaniment, which is saying a lot since usually I bore myself with my unoriginal strumming. Based on actual events :)



My alarm clock rings,
And the birdie sings,
I roll out of bed
And do the same old morning things.

Get into the car,
Can’t believe I’ve made it quite this far,
I’m not gonna shoot an ace, but I can hope to
Come in under par.

I’m just getting through the day
So I can get to the night,
When I’m with you, got nothing to do,
That’s when I feel all right,

My problems seem to slip away,
And somehow it’s okay
When I crawl into bed with you
I know I’ll wake up brand new.

Yea, I’m a mess,
Could be worse, I guess
At least I’m coming home
Please baby, strip me of this stress.

I drink a glass of wine,
While you tell me I’ll be fine.
Eventually things will change
But I’d appreciate a sign.

CHORUS

You’re next to me, you keep me sane,
You’re the reason I’m still on this train
No telling what tomorrow brings
(Like dreams come true or diamond rings)
When I wake up to the song that the birdie sings:

CHORUS

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By Your Side

This is probably the most mellow song I've written so far. Not to be confused by Ben Harper's "By My Side" though that is one of my favorites. I may still play around with the lyrics a little.



I still remember that night,
When you reached out your hand
You said come with me.
I hesitated and you reached out even farther
You said come with me.
You told me don’t worry, ‘cause I’ll be
By your side,
By your side.

I could have gone anywhere,
Done anything that I wanted
But I’m here with you.
I could have left anytime, escaped with no warning
But I’m here with you.
And that’s where I wanna be:
By your side,
By your side.

Because it doesn’t feel the same way without you,
Well, I’m guessing, ‘cause I haven’t tried.
And my hands would get cold if you took yours away,
So don’t.
Promise you’ll stay,
By my side.

You had a smile on your face
When you reached for my hand
And said stay with me.
You had a ring, got down on one knee
And said stay with me.
Was there ever a doubt I would be
By your side,
By your side.

CHORUS

By your side is where I’ll be
Where there’s you, there’s always me.
By your side.

CHORUS

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Half-Full Girl

The idea for this song popped into my head last week, so I went ahead and wrote it. The title refers to the "glass is half-full vs. half-empty" outlook on life. Although I can't say I always see life from the half-full perspective, I'm trying :)



Yellow sunshine, clear blue skies.
After all the rain, what a nice surprise.
Open blinds and windows up,
Pour out the water in my half-empty cup.

‘Cause I’m more of a half-full girl, you see,
Don’t know why I let those showers get to me,
But now I’m trading in my umbrella for a pair of shades
I’m gonna need ‘em ‘cause the future’s bringing brighter days

I’m ready for this life, and what it’s got in store for me.
Don’t want to fall asleep and miss one single thing.
I’m ready for the feeling that my time has come,
But for now, all I’m gonna do is sing.

Drink my coffee, feel that high.
Watch the storm clouds keep on rolling by.
Count my blessings one by one,
And thank the Lord for all that He has done.

Like making me this half-full girl you see,
Who won’t let the small things in life get to me.
‘Cause I’ve traded in my umbrella for a pair of shades
I’m gonna need ‘em ‘cause the future’s bringing brighter days

I’m ready for this life, and what it’s got in store for me.
Don’t want to fall asleep and miss one single thing.
I’m ready for the feeling that my time has come,
But for now, all I’m gonna do is sing.

I’m gonna sing for my supper,
Gonna sing for my rent.
Gonna sing to have the life for which I know that I was meant.
I’m gonna sing until I’ve run out
Of the words and melodies
Because this life’s the only one I’ve got, and this day is mine to seize

I’ll always be a half-full girl, you see,
I’ll never let those showers get to me,
‘Cause I’ve traded in my umbrella for a pair of shades
And I need ‘em each and every single day

I’m ready for this life, and what it’s got in store for me.
Don’t want to fall asleep and miss one single thing.
I’m ready for the feeling that my time has come,
But for now, all I’m gonna do is sing.
But for now, all I’m gonna do is sing.

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This One Time, at Bandcamp...

So, I just discovered the coolest music-sharing site ever. Seriously, like, EVER. Well, ok, I didn't discover it. Actually, Allison Weiss (who is kind of my hero) found it first and tweeted about it today, and it seemed worth checking out. The site is called Bandcamp and it allows you to upload your music, which people can then listen to and download either for free or for a price set by you. It takes care of the technical stuff and transactions for you, yet doesn't take a cut of your sales. It also allows you to personalize your page's design, colors, and background. Click on "music" in the menu at the top of this page to see what I mean. And while you're there, you may as well download my album, My First Try. You have no excuse not to: it's free, guys.

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Live at the Corkscrew

This picture may lead you to believe that I was performing in the fancy cheese section of a grocery store, but in actuality, I was performing in the fancy cheese section of the Corkscrew Wine Emporium. The Corkscrew hosts a wine tasting every Friday, and I got to provide the entertainment this week! I had an absolute blast - new venue, new friends, and new songs.

I also took this as an opportunity to experiment with recording myself live (at the suggestion of my friend and fellow musician Joe Frawley), and it turned out ok. Not great, just ok. I learned a lot about microphone placement, but I'm still scratching my head at GarageBand. I recorded the entire set as one track and had no problems separating and independently saving the first 14 songs, but after that, GB kept telling me that the file type wasn't supported when I tried to save the last 9 songs. If you have any advice or insight, let me know!

Anyway, I thought I'd share the recordings that did turn out, so here they are (in alphabetical rather than performance order). Feel free to listen...and keep in mind, this was my first try :)

1, 2, 3, 4
Be OK
Crazy
Don't Know Why
Giving Up
Half-Full Girl
I Want You
I Will
Life is Wonderful
Lucky
Second Chance Dance
The Best Day
The Best Days of Your Life
What You Have to Do

ETA: My genius of a husband solved the GB problem! I should have just asked him in the first place, I suppose. Oh well. Here are the last 9 songs in performance order.

Sweet Sweet Summer
Sensitive
Scared of Heights
You've Got a Friend
You Belong With Me
By Your Side
The First Day of My Life
My Life Would Suck Without You
Baby Girl

"Half-Full Girl" and "By Your Side" are my two newest. I literally wrote them two days before the gig, so they are far from perfect. But let me know what you think!

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And So It Begins

Wedding Season, that is. We are at the age where just about all of our friends are getting engaged or married, which means we have lots of celebrating to do. And gift-buying, and check-writing, and bridal party gear purchasing...but that's all part of the fun :)

We have three weddings to attend in the next two months, and the first is tonight. Our friends Anthony and Erica are tying the knot here in Springfield, so we don't have to travel far. Bonus! Actually, only one of the three weddings this summer is out of town, and even then, it's less than two hours away. We'll save the real traveling for January, when we go to New Jersey/New York for Dustin and Kristin's nuptials.

All of these weddings bring back fond memories of ours, which - unbelievably - was almost an entire year ago. It was the most perfect day ever, and I was telling Zach last night that I wish we could do it all over again, just once. Not all of the planning and hard work, of course; just the day itself. Everything was perfect and beautiful and fun. But I'll save the real reminiscing until August.

Anyway, we're excited about the first wedding of the summer. A great excuse to get dressed up, have a few glasses of wine, and remind ourselves that we've been there, done that.

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Dad's Day

Happy Father's Day! This is my dad and I. We spent the afternoon and evening together, and I got to eat his delicious spaghetti :) I am so lucky to have an amazing dad, stepdad, and father-in-law. Hope your Father's Day was spectacular.

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Engaged!

This is my little brother Josh and his FIANCEE, Jeni. They just got engaged during a trip to South Carolina (where they are moving next week) and this is their official engagement photo. I kid, I kid...they are two beautiful people, as displayed below:

Jeni just received her bachelors degree in nursing from Southern Illinois University in Edwardsville.

Josh completed his bachelors degree in psychology at University of Illinois in Springfield.

They are moving to Columbia, South Carolina next week, where Josh is entering the graduate program in criminology at USC and Jeni will begin her nursing career. Exciting stuff! My mom is throwing an engagement/going-away party for them this weekend; one last party before the BIG party...the WEDDING! One of the eight that Zach and I will be attending in the next year or so. And those are just the ones we know about already. Good thing we both love celebrating the nuptials of our friends and families :)

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Ballers

I think Sadie has more skillz than me on the basketball court.

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Carnegie Hall

Been there, done that. No, seriously! Even though we were among a hundred other people, my mom and I sang on the Carnegie Hall stage in June of 2004 (almost exactly five years ago). We were invited by a choir director whose church choir was participating in the concert, which featured the music of Morten Lauridsen. It was pretty awesome.

The view from the balcony, where my stepdad was taking pictures. Can you spot us?
Clue: we're the ones in black.

Theeeeeere we are!!

How did we get to Carnegie Hall? Well we definitely didn't "practice, practice, practice." I think we'd looked through the music a total of 2 times before arriving in NYC and attending the few rehearsals for the performance, but somehow we pulled it off. Next time I'll try to be a little better prepared ;)

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How Come I Wasn't Invited?

How dare Kelly, Katy, and Rihanna hang out in Barbados without me!

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Puppy Tricks

Zach and I had nothing better to do tonight than to make videos of our most adorable puppy. These will be fun to look back upon when she's full-grown (and no longer a threat to every piece of furniture, clothing, and human limb in our house).

She's got the "sit" thing down, but we're still working on everything else.


Sadie went surfing on some magazines.

Before our impromptu video shoot, I literally spent all day in my office creating two new sets of iPod Bingo games for my students. This meant making twelve unique cards for each set, and editing and creating 48 thirty-second song and sound clips. Talk about tedious work. I still have a lot to do tomorrow, since it's my last full day to prepare for the start of summer lessons and music therapy on MONDAY. Where has the last week and a half gone?

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This Week in Pictures

I haven't posted in a while, which shames me to no end :( Well, ok...not really, considering the busy week I've had and the fact that I've been celebrating SUMMER VACATION. So let me fill you in on what I've been up to of late:

As previously mentioned, my brother and I treated our dad to a Cardinals game in St. Louis. We had great seats and an awesome time. The best part was when my dad totally called Pujols' home run. Cards won that one :)

The very next day, I celebrated my 26th birthday at The Corkscrew, where we ate, drank wine, and I opened lots of wonderful presents from my wonderful family and friends.

The next day, I watched as Zach subjected our nephew, Mason to his worst nightmare...Sadie. Actually, Sadie and Mason ended up getting along pretty well, just not at first. This picture is a classic.

So those are the latest happenings in my life. Otherwise, I've been spending far too much time in my office prepping for the start of summer lessons and music therapy (next Monday!) and letting the puppy out every hour or so. I'm determined for her to have no accidents on my watch. So far, so good, except once; my mom stopped by to play with Sadie, and she got a little too excited all over the carpet.

Now it's couch time, which I look forward to every night. I have shows to watch, people!

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Sadie & Me

Zach informed me last Wednesday that he would be spending most of the weekend in Chicago with some friends, which meant I would have total responsibility of Sadie for two entire days. The initial thought was a little scary, but we actually had a pretty great time, the two of us. In total, we went on four walks, spent countless hours playing with her favorite tug o' war toy, and made some great headway in the potty-training department :)

I even managed to be sort of productive when I wasn't playing with Sadie. I bought and put together a cute little table for my office and did some much-needed reorganizing/filing/decorating. I also did laundry, vacuumed, and prepared for the workweek...all before going to bed by 11 pm each night. I know you're jealous!

I woke up this morning to a beautiful, perfect day, and could feel the magnetic force leading me to the pool. After my jaunt around the neighborhood with Sadie, I walked down to my mom's and spent a few glorious hours in the sun, reading magazines and being reminded of how much I love summer.

Now I'm ending this perfect day on the couch with my hubby and my puppy, watching some great TV and reveling in the thought that tomorrow is my last Monday at school for a long time. So hard to believe.

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Baseball and Babies

That's my nephew, Mason. He is a Cardinals fan like me...not a silly Cubs fan like his Uncle Zach. We got to hang out at the game last week, and we had a great time. Especially since the Cardinals beat the Cubs :)

My brother and I gave my dad tickets to a Cardinals game for his birthday, so the three of us are going next week. There's nothing more summery than a baseball game, so needless to say, I can't wait. I need a little summer in my life.

Besides baseball, the real summer kickoff is my birthday! I'm turning 26 a week from tomorrow, which I find pretty much impossible. A few months ago, I wrote about Zach turning 26 and how I got to cling on to 25 for a little while longer. Well, "a little while longer" is now mere days, and then I will officially be past the midpoint of my twenties. Scary.

In other baby news, Sadie is exhibiting all the classic signs of puppyhood. Chewing, nipping, peeing (mostly outside...mostly), and being so cute that it makes up for all her bad habits. Here's one last gratuitous photo to end this rambly post:

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Introducing...Sadie!

This is our brand new baby, Sadie. She's 8 weeks old, almost 8 pounds, and a complete handful. But we are already head-over-heels in love with her, not to mention that she has made us the most popular house on the block! Zach and I have more new friends under the age of 12 than we can count. It's hard to resist this face, isn't it?
And the puppy's cute too. Just kidding ;) We are learning that it is definitely hard work raising a puppy, but very worth it. Middle-of-the-night potty trips and all.

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The Sound of My Own Voice

When I was growing up, I hated listening to recordings of myself, whether it was my speaking or singing voice. In high school, after making and listening to an audition video for a college application, I cried. A little dramatic, I know, but I was surprised (in an unpleasant way) by how I sounded.

Over time, I have gotten used to listening to playback of my voice. Since I record so many songs for my work, I have to listen to them over and over again during the editing process. I also have to hear myself as I walk through the halls at school, since so many of the classrooms play my music therapy CDs for their students.

This weekend, I recorded an interview for a podcast by a music therapist in New York named Wade Richards. It was so much fun to listen to it once it was finished (which you can also do here) though I am ridiculously critical of myself. I'm trying to become less so, but it's slow-going. At least I don't cry anymore :)

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Grand Plans

I can't believe it's May. Furthermore, I can't believe my birthday is a month from today, and I will be 26! Heading into my second quarter-century has gotten me thinking about the future quite a bit. I am extremely satisfied with my life and career at this point in time, but I can't help but feel that there are certain goals I need to accomplish while I'm still in my twenties. You know, like become famous, make my first million, etc. I kid, but the truth is that I can't shake this feeling.

So what am I going to do? Well, for starters, I will not be providing music therapy at Hope during the summer for the first time in three years. Instead, I am going to take that time and invest it in some very focused work - songwriting, building my business, and expanding my music therapy blog, among other things. I'm hoping this will pay off in the long run, though I will miss the extra paychecks. And the kids, of course.

Also, we're getting a dog. (I just typed "god" two times on accident.) A golden retriever named...well, you'll just have to wait and see. We are counting down the days until she is ours. This doesn't exactly have a place on my aforementioned must-do-in-my-twenties list, but it does have a place on my must-do-in-life list.

And that is where my list ends, for now. But I am always brainstorming...and who knows what else will fall out of the sky, the way things tend to do in my life :)

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Emperor of Daffodils

Late last year, a guy named Joe Frawley discovered my little blog, listened to my music, and liked what he heard. He got in touch with me to tell me so, and asked if I'd be interested in collaborating with him. I love to try new things, so of course I said yes...and now I'm an official member of the Joe Frawley Ensemble.

Joe's work is like nothing I'd ever heard before. I'll let you read what he writes about himself and his work on his website:

I am a pianist/composer/sound collage artist whose work falls between the cracks of several different genres, though I manage to find an audience with fans of ambient, experimental, and post-rock music. My approach is to combine original piano music with found sound samples, which I process electronically to simulate subsconcious states-- dreams, trances, auditory hallucinations, involuntary memories. I'm particularly interested in the effects of recontextualized speech samples and how they interact with each other to create new meanings. I also try to exploit the musical qualities of speech and aim to put the spoken voice on equal footing with musical (and other) sounds. The resulting work invariably suggests a narrative, though I try not to impose a particular story upon the the listener, preferring instead the individual and subjective interpretations of imaginative minds. Other interests include creating and photographing found object assemblages, and l have lately been experimenting with video montage.

Joe and I have become friends and frequent correspondents solely via the internet, and Greg Conte (the other member of the ensemble) and I submit our musical contributions to Joe via email. Joe has put together an amazing EP entitled Emperor of Daffodils, with a release date set for next month. This is what he writes about it:

I came across this You Tube video- and apparently there are others like it- of a young woman doing her makeup, talking about which eyeshadows she likes, how she puts on lipstick, etc. And then people would comment back saying "you're so pretty", "that shade looks good on you". It occurred to me that a web cam functions something like a magic mirror to some people, as in: "Who's the fairest of them all?" And it wasn't just one video, she had dozens of them. A lot of the samples you hear on this project come directly from that source. This was the initial fascination, which then lead to further explorations of the idea, from slightly different angles, including the male perspective. I have always found it fascinating, for example, to watch a woman put on makeup. It's a whole world I know nothing about, and have no place in- the world of feminine beauty rituals. This is what lead to the idea of an Emperor of Daffodils (that is of narcissists- the flower in French, narcisse, is named after the mythic figure). I imagined it as a fantasy for a man to have dominion over an empire of self-loving beautiful women, a fantasy which could easily turn dark, as you can imagine. This CD has been the most strictly programmatic work I have made, and I found working within the limits of the concept to be creatively liberating. I am encouraged by the results of this recording and hope to do more collaborative work in the future. –JF

Are you ready for something completely different? Go listen to excerpts of it here.

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Of Padres and Palm Trees

So I mentioned that Zach and I took a trip to San Diego. Did I mention that I am moving there next week? At least, in my dreams, I am. I've been there once before, but it wasn't until this vacation that I believed all the things I had always heard about the place. It is gorgeous, and really, really difficult to leave. Difficult to the point where Zach had to ask me on more than one occasion to stop crying. Here's a little pictorial recap:

We stayed at the famous Hotel Del Coronado. It was absolutely gorgeous, and it felt so historic. It was built in 1888, after all. Our room was cute and antiquey, and the grounds were so nice that I wanted to just hang out there all day.

On the first day of our trip, we toured Petco Stadium - home to the San Diego Padres. It was a really nice place, and very cool to be able to see all the parts that are normally off-limits at any stadium. We got to go on the field, hang out in the press box, and sit in the dugout.

After we left the stadium, we went to the world famous San Diego Zoo. I have never been a huge fan of zoos, so I didn't find it especially exciting. The animals were cute, though; I loved the koalas! And we got to take a double-decker bus tour through the zoo.

Old Town was one of the highlights of the trip. There are a bunch of really cute shops and old-timey places to visit, and we ate lunch at a cool place called the Coyote Cafe, where they serve like 500 different brands of Tequila.

Later that afternoon, we drove to La Jolla and found this hang-gliding cliff. It was awesome to see all the hang-gliders take off and land, and the view was breathtaking.

This is how I spent two entire days. My life was complete with my iPod, books, magazines, and of course, sunscreen. I was happy that Zach lasted at least a couple hours both days, but he's definitely not a pool rat like me.

We spent some quality time on the beach, as well. Mostly it consisted of Zach taking pictures, and me serving as his model. A job I didn't mind too much :)

When all was said and done, we had over 400 pictures documenting our 5-day vacation. Every time I look at them, it makes me nostalgic and I can't wait to go back. But alas, I must look to the future...which consists of only 23 school days until summer break! Not that I'm counting, or anything :)

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In No Particular Order

1. Just returned from San Diego. Amazing trip. Recap and pictures coming soon.
2. I love my new house. Coming home every night makes me happy.
3. Lots of ideas in my head, all fighting for my attention.
4.You should watch this video.
5. 80 degree days coming later this week. Too excited for words.
6. Only 5 full weeks left in the school year.
7. Not loving the cold I have at the moment.
8. This weekend is going to be very busy.
9. I want an iPhone for my birthday.
10. I promise my next post will be much more interesting.

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"The Glow"

Yesterday, my mom turned 50. 5-0! Unfortunately, instead of a beautiful day on which she could ride around in her convertible with the top down, she got snow and 30-degree temps. But we did the real celebrating last Saturday at the Alamo, where all of my mom's family and friends gathered to eat, drink, and be merry :)
I performed a few songs at the party, and then at the end, I surprised my mom with a special song I had written just for the occasion. It's called "The Glow".



There’s a light, it’s shining bright.
No matter how dark the night should get
It makes everything alright.
And I feel it every day.
I don’t think you need another clue,
That light is you.

Oooh, I want to celebrate you,
And tell you just how great you are.
Why you’re a star.
Ooh, I want to celebrate you,
‘Cause I appreciate you, oh.
I hope you already know,
So just bask in the glow.

Ask anyone, they’ll say the same.
They feel the warmth at just the mention of your name.
Look around, at every face.
Each one reflecting your loving light
And your never-ending grace.

Three hundred sixty-five,
Of every year I’ve been alive,
You’ve been my tireless tower of strength.
You held my hand along the way,
You made me who I am today,
For me you went to every length.

You are loved, beyond compare.
And I’m happy just to know
That when I need you you’re right there.
So make a wish, and blow the candles out,
But your light will always shine beyond
A shadow of a doubt.

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Rachology

Sometimes I feel like blogging, yet I have nothing to blog about. I could tell you all about my ideas for decorating, or the fun I've been having in my new house, but that category has been maxed for the time being. So instead, how about a little schooling in the subject of Rachology?

FOODOLOGY

What is your salad dressing of choice?
Zesty Italian (the Good Seasons kind)

What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
PF Chang's

What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
Homemade Chex Mix

What are your pizza toppings of choice?
Sausage, but only if it is in little pieces. I hate the big chunks.

What do you like to put on your toast?
Peanut butter and honey.

TECHNOLOGY

How many televisions are in your house?
4, but one more is on the way.

What color cell phone do you have?
Red.

BIOLOGY

Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Left, which means I'm always smudging. This drives me insane, the perfectionist that I am.

Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
Not yet.

What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A huge bag full of stuff from our old kitchen yesterday.

Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
Not that I can remember.

BULLCRAPOLOGY

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
Absolutely not.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
I wouldn't. I love my name! Thanks, Mom and Dad.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
Right now? Yes! Buying a house = bye bye, money.

DUMBOLOGY

How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
Probably about 10.

Last time you had a run-in with the cops.
Probably when Zach got pulled over a couple summers ago.

Last person you talked to?
Ryan (a student at school).

Last person you hugged?
Zach.

FAVORITOLOGY

Season?
Summer, hands down.

Holiday?
Christmas, hands down.

Favorite day of the week?
Saturday, hands down.

Month?
June, hands down.

CURRENTOLOGY

Missing someone?
Yes.

Mood?
Anxious...for the weekend.

What are you listening to?
The sound of my typing.

Watching?
My computer screen.

Praying for?
Nothing in particular right now.

RANDOMOLOGY

First place you went this morning?
Mom's house, to lend her coffee.

What's the last movie you saw?
Rachel at the Wedding on Netflix last night.

Do you smile often?
Yes!

Sleeping Alone Tonight?
Nope.

OTHER-OLOGY

Do you always answer your phone?
No. I sort of hate talking on the phone.

Its four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?
No one I know.

If you could change your eye color what would it be?
Brown is fine with me.

Do you own a digital camera?
Yes. I am currently on my fourth.

Have you ever had a pet fish?
No.

Favorite Christmas song(s):
Far too many to list, but if I had to choose one - "The Christmas Waltz" from Carpenters' Christmas.

What's on your wish list for your birthday?
Maybe some new music therapy instruments, or a Wii, or a TV for my office.

Can you do push ups?
Yes.

Can you do a chin up?
Probably not!

Does the future make you more nervous or excited?
Excited.

Do you have any saved texts?
Tons.

Ever been in a car wreck?
I have rear-ended and been rear-ended.

Do you have an accent?
I don't think so.

What is the last song to make you cry?
Whatever song was playing on Grey's Anatomy last week.

Plans tonight?
Teaching piano lessons, making dinner, and then maybe some recording.

Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?
No.

Name 3 things you bought yesterday.
Actually, nothing. I'm so proud of myself!

Have you ever been given roses?
Many times.

Current worry?
I'm always worried about several different things.

Current hate right now?
Crappy weather.

Met someone who changed your life?
Several.

How did you bring in the New Year?
In the Chicago 'burbs with some friends.

What song represents you?
"Blessed" by Martina McBride.

Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
As long as I could come right back when I wanted to.

Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?
Only my husband.

Do you have any tattoos/piercings?
Only my ears.

Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now?
It will almost be my first wedding anniversary.

Does anyone love you?
Of course.

Ever had someone sing to you?
Zach sings to me every day. I usually have to beg him to stop after awhile.

When did you last cry?
Probably yesterday. I cry a lot.

Do you like to cuddle?
Yes!

Have you held hands with anyone today?
Yes, one of my students held my hand while I was working with him.

What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?
Amy Grant and Wilson Phillips.

Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Mostly old.

Do you like pulpy orange juice?
Yes.

What is something your friends make fun of you for?
Photographing my life and displaying it on Facebook.

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The Best Part of Waking Up

Now that I'm all settled in my new kitchen, I have begun experimenting with all the happy, shiny (and sometimes scary) appliances we received as wedding gifts. Among the first of those was this little baby - a Cuisinart coffeemaker. I think this particular one overwhelmed me the most, because it seemed complicated and foreign. Until a couple weeks ago, I had never made coffee in my life. Thankfully, that has all changed.

Over the last couple of months, I had depended on Diet Mountain Dew to jolt me awake and keep me going throughout the day, but it just didn't seem right. Mountain Dew was made for college students slaving away on papers in the middle of the night, not young professionals with mortgages. Right? Well, at least in my book.

Now my morning staple and much-needed caffeine fix matches my age, and I actually look forward to waking up in the morning. When I do, at the ungodly hour of 5:30 am, there is a fresh pot of coffee waiting for me in the kitchen. I can't wait to experiment with different brands and flavors, and to actually use the coffee grinder sitting on the counter (still untouched). This whole grown-up thing is really growing on me.

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I Like to Move It Move It

Saturday was moving day. Finally! We had been slowly bringing things over and unpacking all week, and by Saturday I was exhausted. We spent Monday through Friday night at the new house, staying up wayyy past my bedtime trying to get things organized and ready for Saturday. On Tuesday night, Zach and I slept on the floor in my office with only a comforter, so when we brought the daybed mattresses over on Wednesday, it was like staying at the Four Seasons (comparably speaking).

On Friday, Zach's sister, brother-in-law and nephew came up from St. Louis with a Penske truck full of our brand-new bedroom furniture. They helped us move more things over from the old house, and Rebecca taped for painting, helped me with laundry, and lots of other helpful things.

Saturday was a crazy whirlwind. We got up really early, and I took a trip over the the old house to load up the rest of my clothes and other miscellaneous items. My brother, his girlfriend, and Zach's brother came to town to help us, and our friend Jose Carlos joined in the fun, too. The boys got busy with more moving, saving the best for last: my piano. Those poor guys had to take it up a flight of stairs from my parents' basement, load it into the truck, and then carry it into our new house. Luckily it went to my office, which is on the main floor right off the front door. That was super impressive.

I spent Saturday night and all day Sunday organizing and doing more unpacking. Zach and I made a trip to Target, and then I finally tackled our bedroom closet (which I had been putting off all weekend). It took five hours last night, but I finally finished it. I am pretty proud of my work :)

This morning I made a to-do list for the night, and it is growing longer as I think of more things. At least it doesn't include laundry...I don't think I could handle one more pillow case or towel. Ahh, moving.

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I Bought a House Today

The best day ever! Our closing went very smoothly, though my hand was a little sore after signing approximately 7495939 forms. Zach and I, along with our amazing parents, spent the entire afternoon and evening loading, unloading, and unpacking and we are EXHAUSTED. But it was completely worth the hard work - I finally got to open all of our wedding gifts, which have been sitting in our basement for the last seven months. It was like Christmas, my birthday, and our wedding all over again once all the shower and wedding gifts were unpacked and put in place at the new house.

Zach's dad, the family shutterbug, took some great pictures with his awesome camera, so here are just a few of us outside our home. I am waiting until next week to reveal the interior...we are having several rooms painted, and I want to do some before/afters.

Our yard is huge!

Right before they whisked the sign away.

The front door.

Entering my new house for the first time!

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This Dropped Today...

...and so far I am thoroughly enjoying it. Thanks Dad! My life would suck without Kelly Clarkson, and I can safely bet that you'd agree :)

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A Love Letter

Dear First Home,

It's hard to believe that we've lived in you for almost three years...holy cow. On March 28, 2006, you became ours and we couldn't wait to move in.

We gave you a bit of a makeover, though you were stubborn with your impossible wallpaper and made us really work hard. But in the end, you looked beautiful and kept your original charm. We didn't even have to touch your cute kitchen!

We bought some new furniture to fill you up, and we shared lots of meals in your dining room. Thanks for being such a great place for entertaining all of our friends...we were one of the few that had a nice house like you.

We're leaving you soon, but don't worry, we'll be back to visit. (We happen to be pretty close to the new owner!) We experienced a lot inside of you, our first house together. From our first Christmas tree to our first home as a married couple, we will never forget you.

So long, old friend! Thanks for all the great memories we made within your walls, and for keeping us safe and warm. You're going to make the next owner very happy.

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The Proof is in the Purcell

Since I spend most of my days composing and singing children's songs, many people find it really hard to believe that I have a background in classical music. My classical training began in the 6th grade, and I even remember my first song: "Caro Mio Ben" from the ever popular 24 Italian Songs & Arias. My college days were spent in practice rooms, trying to convince myself that I was an opera singer...and the truth is, I wasn't very successful in doing so. I know I wasn't meant to sing that kind of music forever, but hey, it's cool to think back to the days when I could pull it off!

So a few weeks ago I dusted off the recording of my college senior recital, and I thought it would be fun to share a song or two from it. Tonight's feature is Henry Purcell's "Music for a While". The song is super creepy, at least in my opinion...especially the words. But Purcell is one of my favorite composers, and I remember loving the fact that his songs were in English :)



Music for a while
Shall all your cares beguile:

Wond'ring how your pains were eas'd
And disdaining to be pleas'd

Till Alecto free the dead
From their eternal bands.

Till the snakes drop from her head,
And the whip from out her hands.

Talk about imagery. I had fun singing this back in the day, but I think it was even more fun to listen to my younger soprano self now that my musical inspiration comes from Laurie Berkner and Raffi! Oh how the times have changed.

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Missing Mardi Gras

Zach is feeling a little Mardi Gras withdrawal this weekend. For the past eight years, he has braved the freezing cold and the crowds of thousands in order to collect dollar-store beads and drink $8.00 hurricanes - the St. Louis version of Fat Tuesday. I've been with him for two of those years (the picture was taken last year) and I'd have to say that my first Mardi Gras was one I'll never forget:

Rewind to February 2006. Zach, his sister, father, some friends, and I ventured into Soulard (the neighborhood in STL where the craziness goes down) with a plan. We had a designated meeting spot just in case we somehow were separated, which was a necessity because cell phones DO NOT WORK there. Too many people, too few signals. Zach made me repeat the spot back to him several times, which of course I did. So we enjoyed the parade for a bit, and then my friend Erin suggested we go find a bathroom. This is where the trouble began.

Erin and I decided to enter one of the buildings in search of a bathroom, which happened to be a house party. The house was huge, and a little confusing between the three stories and seemingly hundreds of people. Eventually I lost sight of Erin, though I did find a bathroom. I went back outside in the hopes that she was waiting for me there, but she was nowhere to be found. I had long forgotten about the designated meeting spot, and panic set in. Erin had my cell phone, so I couldn't even try calling anyone..so I just walked. And walked, and walked. Finally, I ended up standing outside of a church on the outskirts of the mayhem, borrowing random people's cell phones to call Zach. I did get a hold of him after awhile, and told him that I was standing outside a church. One of probably 25 in Soulard. It took about 45 minutes, but finally Zach's dad's car pulled up and the door opened. I jumped in and never looked back.

That year for Christmas, Zach's family gave me a Mardi Gras Survival Kit, complete with snacks, phone numbers, and a map of Soulard. Luckily I didn't need to use it since I wasn't able to attend the following year. But we did go last year, with (almost) no getting lost. All in all, a success.

This year we decided to bypass Mardi Gras. The forecast called for 20-degree temps, and we are taking it pretty easy these days with the big move coming. Needless to say, I'm not too disappointed ;)

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